I’m still reeling from yesterday & my totally misreading what Shell wanted. Not me that’s for sure & definitely not by force.
I cannot believe I thought she would want to be taken forcibly. I was thinking about all the sexting we’d done on the subject & my last visit when she said afterwards that she had later fantasised that I had forced my way with her on the couch & had actually brought herself to orgasm with that fantasy.
But that’s the crux. It’s her fantasy. And that’s all it is regardless of how much it turns her on that’s the way it should stay.
I wouldn’t blame her for never contacting me again after all this. I’m such a schmuck.